Friday 21 December 2012

Sponsored Santa

After the big event yesterday today is a slow news day (as they say in the newspaper industry). They get over it by having a front page full of Pippa Middletons bottom, but you'll be pleased to know I have no access to the aforementioned extremity. Instead I'll relate a strange happening we experienced last Sunday but failed to report at the time. Having driven home from London in record time we got stuck in a traffic jam entering the village, of all places. All of a sudden a Father Christmas on a mountain bike came towards us from the village and disappeared down a side road, quickly followed by another, and another, and another etc. etc. A Mother Christmas even put in an appearance. Their bikes were caked in mud, as were their legs and feet. One enterprising Santa dismounted whilst crossing the bridge over the river Soar and proceded to dunk his bike in the water several times. Fortunately the river was not in flood at the time but Santa eventually climbed aboard his spotlessly clean bike and followed the others. Ultimately we discovered the jam was caused by the water board digging a hole in the village centre, as they do. Later the same day we escaped the village via another route heading to Bradgate Park (similar to Richmond Park but with more challenging terrain). On a roadside verge we passed a sign stating: "Beware. Santa's in road" and, before you rush off and look, it does not appear in the Highway Code. The reason for the excess of Santa's was a sponsored Santa bike-ride through Bradgate Park and local roads. For the record, the flood plains are still flooded, houses near the river are sand-bagged and the Co-Op car park is two feet underwater again, although there are no cars stranded therein as happened last time. The Soar is extremely full but not overflowing yet and it has stopped raining. Following our adventures yesterday we fully expect Toyota (a local firm)to change their advertising rear-screen stickers to; The car floating in front is a Toyota. Royalties will be claimed.

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