Thursday 21 March 2013

mole parachute regiment

sunny but cold this morning. I'm worried about the rhino. His mouth was very wide open this morning revealing a full set of upper jaw teeth. In fact the lower jaw looks as if it may drop off anytime soon, which would be a shame, but at least both horns will remain in Anstey rather than on some dusty street in China. Boat signwriting arrangements confirmed and I informed MCC of the revised price, giving them the opportunity to work out their reduced commission without the risk of being ripped-off. I made another pilgrimage to the Walkers crisp factory having tip-toed over one of the lakes again. I could have wolfed a packet of their new natural chicken flavour (KFC rejects?)deep-ridged crisps by the time I arrived, but that would have defeated the object of my walk. On the way home across a grassy ridge I suffered another dizzy/dead left hand moment but fortunately was next to a doggy poo bin at the time on which I sat (it had a lid on)until I recovered. A minute or so at the most. I've never felt so grateful for dog poo before! I reckon we have at least 90% of the UK mole population around here as molehills are everywhere, including major roundabouts. The recently announced defence cuts will, I'm sure, restrict their movements further afield (excuse the pun). The parachute regiment will have a reduced supply of their basic kit which in turn reduces the number of used parachutes abandoned in the countryside. The parachute regiment is being renamed the skydiving regiment with the blood-curdling attack call of "To infinity and beyond" as they leave the plane. Moles are not renown for their skydiving skills apparently.

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