Playing God

The rhino's head is bobbing up and down, indicating a very windy day. The big yellow blob is in the sky yet again. It's starting to be a habit. Following my fruitless trip to hospital yesterday I suffered the mother of all dizzy spells during the evening and two during the night, complete with my previous early warning system of acid indigestion. The trips to the bathroom were via a very wavy route and I fortunately kept upright via the help of nearby furniture. I woke with a thumping head. The only plus point was receiving breakfast and lunch in bed thanks to my tireless carer Lynne. My head is still thumping as I write this. My intention is to return to bed but get up for tea. The trip to see the boat has been delayed till tomorrow, which indicates just how bad I am feeling. Reflecting on yesterday I am now fully aware I am simply a bar code number on NHS records. The neurologist making the decision on whether to change my anti-seizure drug (there are several on the market, all with different side-effects, depending on the patient) or vary my present doseage again made the decision to change nothing after talking to my carer (not me!!)from the end of a telephone line. Diagnosis by Skype? I always thought it best to make an assessment of bedside manner when the doctor was at your bedside, not someone else's. Anyway, if he feels confident enough to play God from afar, good luck to him, but he's lost another patient. (gone away, not died, thankfully). The Liverpool pathway (a cunning NHS plan to reduce costs and meet performance targets by removing treatment, food , water and basic care, particularly for older patients) seems to have a lot going for it at the moment. I have also "chased" my GP again (chance would be a fine thing)for a counselling programme to tackle my depression but it takes time to organise apparently. This Liverpool pathway seems to have spread like foot and mouth disease. The pathway is so called as it started in a Liverpool hospital and quickly spread across the UK, apparently undetected by Hospital Managers, undertakers and the Minister of Health.